A cultural activist, Lawrence Akangagnang Abakisi, has pushed back against claims in a viral video suggesting that marriage in the Builsa community is “cheap” and that women are “given out easily,” urging a deeper understanding of the values behind the tradition.
Speaking on the Love Affairs programme on A1 Radio, Mr. Abakisi described the characterization as a misinterpretation of Builsa cultural philosophy, explaining that the system is designed to prioritize relationships over material demands.
He noted that historically, the Builsa people, an agrarian society, viewed marriage not merely as a union between two individuals but as a vital institution for sustaining family lineage and economic productivity.
“In a farming society, labour is essential, and labour comes from people. Marriage was therefore designed to encourage procreation and continuity, not to create barriers,” he said.
According to him, imposing heavy financial demands on prospective husbands would discourage young men from marrying and undermine the social fabric of the community.
Addressing the issue of bride price, Mr. Abakisi clarified that, in Builsa culture, it is deliberately modest, typically consisting of kola nuts, tobacco, and a token sum of money.
“The value is not in the amount. It is the intention and the respect behind it. Marriage is not a marketplace transaction,” he stressed.
He argued that comparing bride price across ethnic groups misses the point, noting that the Builsa system reflects the belief that a woman’s worth cannot and should not be quantified.
Mr. Abakisi further explained that marriage among the Builsa is not a one-time event but a lifelong process involving multiple stages, from courtship, known as “duenideka,” to family acknowledgment and subsequent rites that may extend beyond the woman’s lifetime.
He described traditional courtship practices in which a man regularly visits the woman’s family, bringing small gifts as a sign of commitment and respect. These gestures, though informal, play a key role in building relationships between families.
Responding directly to the viral claim, he said the simplicity of the bride price is a protective measure for women, not a sign of diminished value.
“If the bride price is too high, it can trap women in abusive marriages because the cost of leaving becomes unbearable. Our system ensures that a woman’s dignity and freedom are preserved,” he said.
He emphasized that Builsa marriage practices are rooted in cooperation, mutual respect, and long-term family bonds rather than material exchange. Families continue to support each other through farming, child-rearing, and social obligations, often far exceeding any initial bride price.
“The true value of a Builsa woman is seen in the life she builds with her family. Appreciation is shown over time, not demanded upfront,” he added.
Mr. Abakisi urged the public, especially younger generations, to seek a fuller understanding of their cultural heritage before making public judgments.
“Bride price reflects the identity and values of a people. To call it ‘cheap’ is to misunderstand the very principles on which it was built,” he said.
The discussion has sparked renewed debate on social media, with many calling for greater cultural education to bridge the gap between tradition and modern perceptions.
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